• Skip to primary navigation
  • Skip to main content
  • Skip to primary sidebar
  • Home
  • Bio
  • Bookshelf
    • Audio
    • Complete List of Chautona’s Books
    • The Rockland Chronicles
      • The Vintage Wren
      • The Aggie Series
      • The Hartfield Mysteries
      • Sight Unseen Series
        • Sight Unseen Series Archives
      • The Agency Files
      • Christmas Fiction
    • Legacy of the Vines
    • Meddlin’ Madeline
      • Madeline Blog Archive
    • Ballads from the Hearth
      • Ballads from the Hearth Blog Archive
    • Legends of the Vengeance
    • Journey of Dreams
    • Wynnewood
    • Webster’s Bakery
    • The Not-So-Fairy Tales
    • Heart of Warwickshire
  • Start HERE
    • If You Like…
    • Characters
    • Suggested Reading Order
    • Free Books
  • Blog
  • Contact
  • Podcast
    • Advertising
    • Podcast Guest Information
    • Podcast Interview FAQ
  • Merch Shop
  • Nav Social Menu

    • Email
    • Facebook
    • Instagram
    • Pinterest
    • Twitter
    • YouTube
  • Bonus
  • Speaking
  • New & Coming
Chautona Havig

Chautona Havig

Using story to connect YOU to the Master Storyteller

The Best Thing about Motherhood Is Learning from My Kids

by Chautona Havig · 2 Comments

The Facebook post looked like one many of us have seen. A picture of toys and shoes strewn across the floor followed by the caption of a harried mother.

The poster? My oldest daughter.

She’s a wise girl. She’s also rather raw and “real” in the best sense usually. She’s human. She got that from her mother.

Here’s what she wrote (used with permission from SodbusterLiving):

A bit of reality here for you. Toys not put away, shoes not put away, books left out, and the list goes on. Moments like this really make me want to shout and just get rid of all.

But that is reaction, not discipline. The key is not to remove the problem but work on the cause. So instead of getting rid of it, right now I am focusing more on teaching the habit of tidiness.

We have all heard the rule.

“When you get something out, put it away when you are done.”

Guess what, I’m horrible at this too! Often I take out one thing to work on, rush to complete something that I need to do, and then try to get back to the original task that has been left out, only to find that my attention is needed elsewhere. But the children do not see the process, they only see what is before them: mommy’s mess.

So I have been trying to diligently demonstrate or illustrate what I want my children to do. The hardest thing is to learn to give grace and accept grace. This isn’t going to change overnight, and it will probably take a few years.

Consistency always, and yet is the hardest thing to accomplish.

Start now, mothers. Learn from my mistakes. Don’t focus on the outward as much as focusing on the one simple habit of good stewardship.

That’s some solid thinking right there.

I love it. And while I read that, I realized something about myself. See, people often remember that I said I’d never wanted to be married or have children. They often leave off the part where I also say how GLAD I was wrong about that. I’m thrilled to be both.

But what I neglect to tell them is why—what it is that makes me glad I was wrong about the whole motherhood thing. What I like about it that I never expected to. Well, this story just illustrates it.

The Best Thing about Motherhood Is Learning from My Kids

The Best Thing about Motherhood Is Learning from My Kids

I’ve learned a lot from my kids from the day they were born. From the truth that diapers can and should sometimes be labeled toxic and the use of hazmat suits should be employed to the fact that sleep is often underrated.

Especially by toddlers.

So, without further ado, I thought I’d share what I’ve learned from my kids (now that most are adults).

From #1Daughter, I learn wisdom with money, graciousness under pressure, and a never-ending stream of practical wisdom like that above. She’s wise beyond her years. And always has been.

#2Daughter teaches me the beauty of chasing dreams, even when it means doing a complete 180 from what you thought you wanted. She was going to be an English professor. She now teaches special education, and if you saw the absolute joy that radiates when she speaks of her students, you’d know why it’s the best choice for her—ever.

From #3Daughter, I learn to step outside myself and stretch myself—that it’s okay if you change your mind often about things because it means your mind is growing and considering. Because it means you’re trying new things and being adventuresome.

#4Daughter teaches me consistency and being comfortable with who I am because it’s what it is.

It’s okay, and if someone isn’t okay with it (who I am), that’s okay, too. She holds fast to her convictions but is willing (after some wailing and gnashing of teeth) to be corrected, too. And I kind of like the teeth gnashing bit. It keeps her human. I relate to human.

From #1Son, I learn how to deal with idiots in a way that doesn’t make them feel like idiots. I learn to find humor in the little things and that it’s okay if I’m the only one who notices. And from him, I learn that hard work and determination can get you anything—even when it seems impossible to everyone else around you.

#5Daughter teaches me to learn to do and try new things at my own pace and not to be bullied into someone else’s expectations. She throws others’ opinions to the wind and plows through on her own path and proves them all wrong. Daily.

From #6Daughter, I learn that it’s okay just to live and enjoy life on my own terms without apology. I learn how to brush aside the unjust expectations and unkind words of those who want for me what I don’t want for myself… not yet.

#2Son teaches me the beauty of loyalty, kindness, humor, and acceptance.

I learn joy in the adventure. And that I really don’t want to jump off giant boulders or climb deep into old mines for “fun.”

From #7Daughter, I learn the beauty of kindness that includes the unwanted and learns that those unwanted souls aren’t just people Jesus loves, but interesting people you might want to get to know. And I learn that kindness doesn’t mean one has to allow oneself to be squashed by another, either. Kindness with boundaries… because is it kind to allow someone to sin against you?

Guess what? This relates to one of my books, too.

ready or notShocker, right? No, really. One of my characters learns a boatload of lessons from her kids before most people even have kids.

Aggie, of course.

While I learned a lot from Aggie and her little circle of Titus 2 women, Aggie learned a lot from her kids. She learned that sometimes you roll with punches and other times you fight back. Loyalty, curiosity… the list goes on. And as the author, the cool thing for me was that I got to learn from her as she learned from the kids.

Win/Win.

Grace under pressure—she’ll get there Someday. While she may not exude that beautiful character quality, one does characterize her well—total reliance on the Lord.

I’m still learning that one from her, too.

Share
Pin
Tweet
Email
Share
Pin
Tweet
Email

Related

Filed Under: General Information, Personal

Previous Post: « Why Would Grief Make You Dance with Jesus?
Next Post: So, Did I Find a Great New Series? »

Reader Interactions

Leave a Reply Cancel reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Or, you can subscribe without commenting.

Leave a Reply Cancel reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Comments

  1. Anonymous says

    August 31, 2018 at 5:21 pm

    I loved what you shared about your kids and how you learn from them.
    I love the Aggie series! I love all of your books. I’ve bought most of them.

    Reply
    • Chautona Havig says

      August 31, 2018 at 6:57 pm

      Thank you! I hope one or two of the upcoming Freebies will be ones you haven’t read!

      Reply

Primary Sidebar

The Because Fiction Podcast

The Because Fiction Podcast
The Because Fiction Podcast

Taking the pulse of Christian fiction

Episode 265: A Chat with Karen Witemeyer
byChautona Havig

Nothing says fairy tale like a sweet western romance by an author like Karen Witemeyer… unless it’s a fairytale retelling set in Texas in the late 19th century, right?  Fairest of Heart takes the familiar “Snow White” and turns it on its head with retired cowboys, a self-absorbed actress, a Texas Ranger, and a sweet girl who knows the true Source of her beauty.  Listen in to see all the genius Easter eggs Witemeyer planted in this book.

Note: links may be affiliate links that provide me with a small commission at no extra expense to you.

Sometimes All a Girl Needs Is a True Change of Heart

I fell in love with the cover of Karen Witemeyer’s Head Over Heels a few years back (only to learn it’s much older than that, even), and meant to read that book.  I didn’t.  #BecauseIdiot. Well, that’ll be rectified just as soon as I’m done listening to her first book in a trilogy of fairytale retellings. I loaded it up on my Audible app tonight and wheeeeeeee. Here I go! So much for no new books until October. HA! 

Karen talks about her heart for young women today and how they’re taught by every bit of media blasting at them that they need to use their bodies to get what they need or want when the Lord has a better plan. And I can’t guarantee it, but I strongly suspect she does it without preaching. SQUEE!

Fairest of Heart by Karen Witemeyer

Once upon a time in Texas . . .

Beauty has been nothing but a curse to Penelope Snow. When she becomes a personal maid for a famous actress whose troupe is leaving Chicago to tour the West, she hides her figure beneath shapeless dresses and keeps her head down. But she still manages to attract the wrong attention, leaving her prospects in tatters–and her jealous mistress plotting her demise.

After his brother lost his life over a woman, Texas Ranger Titus Kingsley has learned to expect the worst from women and is rarely disappointed. So when a young lady found in suspicious circumstances takes up residence with the seven old drovers living at his grandfather’s ranch, Titus is determined to keep a close eye on her.

With a promotion hanging in the balance, Titus is assigned to investigate a robbery case tied to Penelope’s acting troupe, and all evidence points to Penelope’s guilt. But Titus might just be convinced that the fairest woman of all has a heart as pure as her last name . . . if only he can prove it.

You can learn more about Karen Witemeyer and her books on her WEBSITE. Don’t forget the book is 30% off on BakerBookHouse.com.  

Follow Karen on BookBub and GoodReads.

And don’t forget her Posse Group on Facebook.

Like to listen on the go? You can find Because Fiction Podcast at:

  • Apple 
  • Castbox 
  • Google Play
  • Libsyn 
  • RSS
  • Spotify
  • Amazon
  • and more!
Episode 265: A Chat with Karen Witemeyer
Episode 265: A Chat with Karen Witemeyer
September 29, 2023
Chautona Havig
Episode 264: A Chat with Romance Author, Sarah Monzon
September 26, 2023
Chautona Havig
Episode 263: A Chat about The Love Script w/ Toni Shiloh
September 23, 2023
Chautona Havig
Episode 262: Chatting about The Legacy of Longdale Manor with Carrie Turansky
September 19, 2023
Chautona Havig
Episode 261: Chatting with Christian Youth Fiction Author, Candice Yamnitz
September 15, 2023
Chautona Havig
Episode 260: A Chat with Rachel Hauck
September 12, 2023
Chautona Havig
Episode 259: A Chat with Debut Author, Laura Conaway
September 8, 2023
Chautona Havig
Episode 258: A Louisiana Christmas to Remember
September 2, 2023
Chautona Havig
Episode 257: A Chat with Fantasy Author, N. Ford
September 1, 2023
Chautona Havig
Episode 256: A Chat about Summer in the Spotlight w/ Liz Johnson
August 29, 2023
Chautona Havig
Search Results placeholder

Love Audio Books?

audio book ad

Check out the Sparrow Island novels. A tiny island with a lot of heart

independence islands series

Featured Books

A Ransomed Grete

A Ransomed Grete
Buy This Book Online
Buy from Amazon
Buy from Amazon Kindle
A Ransomed Grete
Buy now!

Twice Sold Tales

Twice Sold Tales
Buy This Book Online
Buy from Amazon
Buy from Amazon Kindle
Twice Sold Tales
Buy now!

Under the Hibiscus

Under the Hibiscus
Buy This Book Online
Buy from Amazon
Buy from Amazon Kindle
Under the Hibiscus
Buy now!

Upcoming Posts

Sorry - nothing planned yet!

Or just subscribe to the newsletter

Recent Blog Posts

  • What Would Make a Tropical Vacation More Exciting? Find Out!
  • Sometimes All a Girl Needs Is a True Change of Heart
  • How Does an Intense Christmas Competition Lead to Love?

I buy my stickers here! (affiliate)

Custom Stickers, Die Cut Stickers, Bumper Stickers - Sticker Mule
Just another hour... Tea is Pumpkin Masala Chai fr Just another hour...
Tea is Pumpkin Masala Chai from Marcella's Enchanted Cottage and blueberry cinnamon roll courtesy of #6daughter
, @andralane0129 
#AmReading 
#AnnetoberReadAThon 
@teri_blake_author 
#womensfiction
Yum... seriously the best beef ever. So glad we go Yum... seriously the best beef ever. So glad we got some,  but so many missed out. 
Thanks @robsogbbq
Instagram post 18282011413151971 Instagram post 18282011413151971
If you haven't read Seek and Hide by @amandagsteve If you haven't read Seek and Hide by @amandagstevens , stop everything and order this book. Then schedule dinner delivery the day it arrives and dive in. Chilling,  inspiring,  and proof that Amanda is a stellar Storyteller.
#AmReading 
#ChristFic
Reposted from @beccawierwille Less than one month Reposted from @beccawierwille Less than one month until release day for Road Trip Rescue! 🚘 🐶 Mark your calendars for Tuesday, October 24 to help me celebrate sending this story into the world. 

Also, prepare for more posts than normal. I’m excited to launch this book. 🥳
I think the moon is embracing autumn, too. I think the moon is embracing autumn,  too.
Reposted from @lisaphillipsbks Woot! Happy release Reposted from @lisaphillipsbks Woot! Happy release day, @lovereadwriterepeat
  • Home
  • Bookshelf
  • New & Coming
  • Blog
  • News!
  • Disclosure & Policies
  • Privacy Policy

Copyright © 2023 · Chautona Havig · All Rights Reserved · Coding by Gretchen Louise

Don't go before you grab your FREE short story collection!