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Chautona Havig

Chautona Havig

Using story to connect YOU to the Master Storyteller

The 8 Worst Words of Homeschooling Advice & How to Avoid Them

by Chautona Havig · 7 Comments

August. The final month (for practical purposes) of those lazy, hazy, crazy days of summer. Popsicles, dashes to the pool, watermelon—lots of delicious watermelon while it lasts.

And then it hits: back to school time.

But with it is back to school season with those long lists of school supplies, clothing shopping, and anxiety. Maybe it’s mom. You’ve watched your kids flounder in the local schools and you can’t figure out why. You have an amazing school district with fabulous teachers. So why is your kid definitely being “left behind”?

Then again, perhaps it’s your kid. He’s becoming more sullen and withdrawn with every mention of notebooks, gym clothes, and backpacks.

The 8 Worst Words of Homeschooling Advice & How to Avoid Them, back to school time

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For whatever reason, that niggling idea of homeschooling hits and you wonder if maybe this is the year.

Now what?

So, you find the local homeschool group, you muster up the courage to go meet with these weirdos who think they can educate a child with a dictionary, the Bible, and a slide rule. What is that thing, anyway?

The talk on co-ops? Exciting. Who knew your kids could learn Spanish, take folk dancing, be in a production of A Midsummer Night’s Dream, and take a watercolor class? Woohoo!

The mini seminar on how to keep records? Wow. This might be doable!

The meeting adjourns. You turn to the woman next to you and introduce yourself. She’s friendly. Happy to meet you. Everything’s going great until you ask the question of new homeschooler death.

“So, what should I buy for curriculum?”

I remember those days. It’s scary. Almost without fail, the women who can sit at park day and argue a dozen schooling philosophies with the vehemence of debaters in an election year clam up. They say those dreaded words.

“You have to find what works for you.”

I swear those are the worst eight words in a budding homeschool mom’s life. Thanks a lot. For nothing.

for keeps coverYou think I exaggerate? HA! I was so frustrated by this as a SEASONED homeschool mom that I put a scene in For Keeps. It goes like this:

“I ordered curriculum for Vannie today. We just have to decide on the others. I don’t think Laird will be so independently motivated, so I chose not to do the video course for him.” Aggie chose to ignore the continued disapproval from William. “What did they say about choosing curriculum?”

Tina’s face twisted in a mixture of disgust and frustration. “I asked almost every woman there and they all agree.”
“So why do you look revolted by their choice.”

“Ask me.” Tina kicked off her shoes, sat cross-legged across from them, and leaned back on her hands. “I dare you to ask me what kind of curriculum you should use.”

“Ok…” The whole thing seemed ridiculous to Aggie. “What kind of curriculum should I use?”

With a falsetto that made William and Aggie snicker before they even heard the answer, Tina said, “Oh, you have to find what works for you.”

“What!”

Yep. It happens.

I watched new, excited moms show up ready to learn from seasoned veterans only to turn away frustrated and disillusioned when no one would give them real, practical help. More often than not, they found themselves with a sticky note that said, “Buy Mary Pride’s Big Book of Home Learning” on it.

If I’d only known then what I know now. There’s a solution to that frustration. Tina figured it out in For Keeps. She says,

“The good news is, I did figure out how to get a feel for what they’d suggest if they weren’t so adamant about everyone blazing their own trail through the home educating wilderness.”

William’s face grew more disapproving with every word. “How?”

“I asked what they use. I went back to every woman and asked what curriculum they use and why.”

That question solves a multitude of frustrations.

When you ask us why we chose what we chose, homeschooling moms wax eloquent (because we don’t have time to wax our floors).

So, I’m here to give new homeschoolers a bit of advice. If you find yourself in a group of ladies who don’t want to unduly influence your choices because their family’s ways might not be best for yours, just ask what they do and why. You might actually get somewhere.

Seasoned homeschoolers, please take pity. Just answer the question they didn’t know they should have asked.  Tell them what you use and why–and then introduce them to someone who has a different philosophy.

And to everyone: I hope this is your best school year ever—regardless of your educational choice!  Oh! If you’re searching for Charlotte Mason-inspired ideas, check out #1Daughter’s YouTube Channel!

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Filed Under: General Information Tagged With: Aggie's Inheritance, Rockland Chronicles

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Comments

  1. Ava Gunn Kinsey says

    August 10, 2017 at 10:13 pm

    It said my comment was too long and then it deleted it. Here’s the more concise version:

    I went from three years of using boxed curriculum to switching to a different Bible and math curricula. I struggled with deciding which math to switch to. Read a lot of online reviews and was disappointed when talking to other mothers who were wishy-washy about their opinions. Finally found a lady (self-proclaimed math junkie) who told me what she loved and why. Happy with my decisions to switch.

    I enjoy Challice’s YouTube channel and learning more about CM. I realized recently that I gave myself a CM-type education by reading lots of living books (thanks to my mom who provided us with good books and encouraged us to use the library). I owe my love of reading to Little House on the Prairie. (I’m currently reading LHitBW to Gracie.) Realized tonight that your book Discovering Hope (first book I read by you) acted as a living book – teaching me about Indian culture. That plus the story drew me to reading more of your books!

    Reply
    • Chautona Havig says

      August 11, 2017 at 12:00 pm

      Aw, thanks for sharing that. How exciting. I remember loving the idea of a box set but being too opinionated to make it work for me. Ahem.

      Reply
  2. Paula Shreckhise says

    August 2, 2017 at 10:10 pm

    lOLOLOL! Been there , done that! I started homeschooling when it was not fashionable. My two oldest were just done with third and sixth grades. They are now 45 and 42! My two youngest never went to public school. They are now 32 and 26 . I would pore over catalogues and pare down my choices because I was working full time and my husband was getting his PHD! We had no money! All I can say is WE ALL SURVIVED! Now my second son and his wife ( who teaches math at the college level) are homeschooling their two boys using the Classical Curriculum. They are learning so much! The only good thing that came out of public school was the sixth grade field trip I got to chaperone: Mackinac Island!
    Your advice is good! It is very hard to try to decide. Thanks .

    Reply
    • Chautona Havig says

      August 2, 2017 at 10:28 pm

      None of our kids have ever gone, either. And man, sometimes when I couldn’t decide, on something new or whatever, I was just ready to scream when I went for help and there was none except very sincere, “You have to find what works for YOU.”

      Reply
  3. Marylin says

    August 2, 2017 at 7:42 pm

    Chautona,
    I’m trying really hard not to think about school. I’ve got three more weeks of vacation and I want to think about reading and relaxation. hehehe!

    Reply
    • Chautona Havig says

      August 2, 2017 at 10:29 pm

      Don’t blame you one bit. Not one.

      Reply
  4. patty-anne says

    August 2, 2017 at 6:39 pm

    My son was in Grade 3 when I had to start home schooling him. I have 5 others that had one to conventional schools .
    When we started I had him at the table from 9 till 3, with 2 -15 minutes recesses and an hour lunch. We nearly finished the whole course in one day.
    I finally joined a home school group who told me we learn by doing as well as a small part of the curriculum.
    I took on a bunch and taught sewing and knitting. another mom did some music work. We arranged field days and day trips.
    We learned fractions by baking, counting by making change.It was really fun. I brought him up 2 grades in the one year and 2 in the second year.

    Reply

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The Because Fiction Podcast

The Because Fiction Podcast
The Because Fiction Podcast

Taking the pulse of Christian fiction

Episode 429: A Chat with J. A. Webb
byChautona Havig

Christian dystopian thrillers are too few and far between, but author J. A. Webb has a great one for us. Listen in while we chat about his Seekers Series and the second book, Inheritance.

note: links may be affiliate links that provide me with a small commission at no extra expense to you.

Mix a corrupt secret society along with a priest on the run, and you’ve got a great mix. This series promises to be full of amazing twists and turns. 

  Inheritance by J. A. Webb

 A Dystopian Thriller of Deception, Faith, and the Fight for Truth

The Order has been betrayed. The hunters have been loosed.

Father Curtis has forsaken his vows. He has left the Order and joined the Seekers, a hidden rebellion dedicated to uncovering the truth long buried by the global church. But walking away from the Order does not mean escaping its reach.

When word spreads that a copy of the True Text — the original thirty-nine books of the Creator — has surfaced on the far side of the world, Curtis, Professor Reuel, and Phillip embark on a desperate mission. If they can retrieve the artifact, it could change everything. If they fail, the truth will be lost forever.

But the Eye of the Eternal, the secret police of the Order, has already mobilized. Their assassins are relentless. Their power is absolute. And they will stop at nothing to silence the truth.

Outnumbered and hunted, Curtis and his allies must risk everything to defy an empire built on deception. But against such overwhelming darkness, is faith enough? Or will their inheritance — humanity’s true past — be erased from history once and for all?

The war for truth has begun. And the Order will not suffer heretics to live.

A Gripping Tale of Power, Deception, and the Courage to Seek Truth

🔥 Perfect for fans of dystopian thrillers like 1984, Brave New World, and The Da Vinci Code—but with a Christian twist!

⚡ A suspense-filled journey into a world where illusion is law and questioning it means death.

📖 If you love stories of faith, defiance, and the battle against unseen tyranny, this is the book for you.

The Order has ruled from the shadows long enough. Are you ready to see the truth?

Learn more about J. A. Webb on his WEBSITE and follow him on GoodReads and BookBub.

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Episode 429:  A Chat with J. A. Webb
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